Saturday 13th Feb 2021 will forever be one of the saddest days in my life.
I knew this time was coming. I could sense it but didn’t want it to be today, or any day let’s be honest. I wanted more time with her. I finally had to say goodbye to my little girl, she has gone to rainbow bridge.
I first met Missy over 18 years ago, she was so small, the runt of the litter and the moment we set eyes on each other – BAM! It was instant love. She was in a shed with her siblings who all ran away when I went to see them, except Missy stayed sitting in front of me. A tiny ball of black fluff with huge blue eyes, when I picked her up she could not stop looking at me and she clambered on my shoulder and snuggled into my neck. There was no way I was leaving without her, our bond had been established.
Missy was such a funny little cat. Her nickname was Ninja Kitteh (and it eventually became mine too) because we would play fight with each other when she was little. She would hide behind doors and pounce on your legs yowling like she was taking part in a 10 person kumite. A few of my friends commented that Missy reminded them of Toothless from How To Train Your Dragon because of her big eyes. She liked Drum and Bass and Hip Hop (she was named after one of my favourite rappers Missy Elliott). We spent many a Saturday night at home with me listening to music and dancing around my front room. Missy would be jumping around too. Missy was brilliant at pistachio nut football, I would kick them around and she would always catch them and expertly dribble them everywhere. For months I would find pistachio nuts everywhere at home and if anyone ever ate them in her company she would start miaowing loudly at them demanding a game of football. I once heckled John Terry at a Chelsea Champions league semi final and shouted that my cat could dribble better than him.
Over the years as Missy got older she began to calm down but still maintained her diva like ways. Like all cats she had an excellent stink eye. She was a lap cat, not so keen on being picked up but she would sit on my lap for hours and fall asleep. Often there were times I had fallen asleep on the sofa and I would wake up and think I was paralysed because I couldn’t feel my legs – Missy would be stretched out on them fast asleep. She always liked to make an appearance on video calls, usually you would see her big eyes first and then like a typical cat she would show her disdain and show everyone her bum.
The last two years Missy’s health began to go downhill. She was diagnosed with kidney disease, high blood pressure and arthritis. She went blind twice last year and managed to astound the vet’s by recovering her eyesight each time when they didn’t think it was possible. But there comes a point in an animal’s life when their health becomes so bad you have to let them go even though it will break your heart. I had time with her at home and played music for her, told her how much I love her. One of the final songs that I played for her was Frankie Goes to Hollywood’s ‘The Power of Love’. It’s one of my favourite songs and I was in tears as she was on my lap. I already knew what the vet’s diagnosis would be and what the options were. I had been expecting this day and knew we were on borrowed time. Missy was becoming so fragile and yet was still so loving… and demanding! I am so grateful they allowed me to be with her until the very end even with Covid guidelines. As heartbreaking as it is for us, it’s the kindest act of love we can give our fur babies. No animal should suffer and live in pain. She was my little fighter, my ninja kitteh to the very end.
I always say there is nothing in life that prepares you for grief, even if you have loved and lost before. Pets have such a huge and important part in our lives, they are a much loved member of our family. The love we have for our furry companions is all encompassing and so pure. So today my heart has been broken as I had to finally say goodbye to my little Moo Moo, little panther, smushface, my Bubsy. Occasionally known as little gobshite when she used to be naughty but she knew she was much loved.
Missy – you were a wonderful companion for so many years. I was blessed to have you for all that time and be your slave / staff.
I will love you always. ❤️🐾❤️
If you are also going through the loss of your beloved fur baby I came across a site Pet Bereavement which I hope provides you with some support at this difficult time.