anxiety – 健康 Jiànkāng

I am Enough

I lost my shit this week. A bit more than I had last week, and a bit more than the week before. Sometimes we carry burdens for far too long by ourselves, thinking we can sort it out and everything will be fine. Then these issues and problems don’t get sorted, and like a drippingContinue reading “I am Enough”

I am not a virus or a China Doll.

My heart is heavy at the continuing rise in hostility and violence towards South East and East Asians during the last twelve months of the Covid pandemic. The recent shooting in Atlanta has sent shockwaves through communities around the world. I am born in the UK and of Hong Kong heritage. This makes me aContinue reading “I am not a virus or a China Doll.”

Mother’s Day

Today is a weird one for me. I have always struggled to say ‘Happy Mother’s Day’ because I don’t have a good relationship with my mum. It was awful when I was younger, when I was kicked out at 17 I didn’t speak to my family for five years. I have tried many times toContinue reading “Mother’s Day”

Doing The Best I Can

There have been a lot of tears lately. For myself and others. Sometimes they fall without me even knowing why, or they fall because I have heard bad news about people I love. I sometimes cry when I am reading and hearing about grief and loss that so many people are going through. Over theContinue reading “Doing The Best I Can”

Inner Child Healing

I have been in a reflective mood recently. I had hit a brick wall and I was in a funk, recent events have jolted me out of this and I realise how much more healing work I have ahead of me. I’m now ready to continue my journey. We all have an inner child. ForContinue reading “Inner Child Healing”

Let me rest my weary soul

I’m tired. Tired of the world. Tired of myself. Normally I’m an optimistic, sunny side up type of person but it’s been hard to keep this up when it feels like the world is falling apart and so many people are also struggling. There is so much death, injustice, corruption, greed, pain and loss goingContinue reading “Let me rest my weary soul”

Why am I here?

Every once in a while I get really tearful and lose my motivation to do anything. I could easily sit on the sofa in my PJs staring into space for hours on end. I comfort eat my feelings in the hope that I will derive some kind of dopamine response but even that still leavesContinue reading “Why am I here?”

New Year, New Me… or can I just be ‘me’?

1st Jan 2021. Happy New Year. I usually feel awkward wishing people a happy new year, especially after what has globally been such a difficult and traumatic time for many. I usually start the year feeling anxious for numerous reasons and I put that feeling aside because I don’t want to overshadow an opportunity forContinue reading “New Year, New Me… or can I just be ‘me’?”

‘Tis The Season To Be Jolly…

What does this time of year mean for you? Does it give you a warm, fuzzy feeling? Fill you with happy memories of Christmases with loved ones, handing out presents around the tree, being with family and eating lots of food, watching the Queen’s speech and having an afternoon nap then looking forward to anContinue reading “‘Tis The Season To Be Jolly…”

Love, Loss & Grief

24 years ago my partner died. I have never written about that time, even though I journal and blog. There was always a part of me that didn’t want to bring up those memories again, the time now feels ‘right’ as this month is the anniversary of his death. Grief is a cruel, ongoing lessonContinue reading “Love, Loss & Grief”